The Art of Letting Go

Lately, I have been going through a lot of pain. I've suffered a lot of heartbreak and have asked myself so many questions that are still not answered. I haven't felt good enough. But most importantly, I mentally wasn't in a good headspace. I became afraid of self-doubt that whatever came my way, it would break me because I felt so vulnerable. I knew I had to talk to someone because I was so afraid of the inner demons that I carried with me. I knew it wasn't something I could do alone. 

Now, I know after reading that, you're probably thinking, "What happened to the girl who wrote about 'Mariposa' and 'Being Happy'?" and I want you to know she is still there. But like all butterflies, we can't see our wings, and sometimes we get stuck in places and get tired - sometimes butterflies give up the fight. However, I knew I couldn't give up because if I wanted to fly, I knew I had to give up the things that were weighing me down.

Within coming to my senses and being over crying every night (yes, I cried a lot - we are human) I finally built up the courage to speak what was on my mind. I talked to someone I knew very well and that I knew I could trust. Someone who wouldn't judge me or question me and just tell me it was okay. After speaking my truth the one thing that was reiterated to me was "just let go". I played it over and over in my head and I knew I wasn't ready. 

"Letting go is painful as hell if it’s not something you’re ready to do: especially if your heart and mind are singing two different songs." 

I read that the other day it instantly felt so relatable. Letting go in this sense is releasing all doubt, worry, and fear about a situation, person or outcome. I thought about it long and hard and it's why I choose to write about this topic because letting go is accepting what is happening right now and not worrying about what will come up tomorrow.

Within these past two days both her and I have had so many different conversations. I even met some pretty inspirational women after attending my first yoga class.

@mintbodystudio based in Miami, FL if you want to check her out on IG

Rosie is the most amazing and inspirational yoga instructor and she is great with first-timers!

In yoga, I focused on my breathing and I let my mind go blank. It was in a moment when I opened my eyes emotions poured out of me. But it wasn't sad emotions. It was this immense amount of pressure that was released. It was as if my heart and mind were telling each other that it was going to be okay. That my ex was okay, my family was okay, my parents were okay, my brothers were okay, my cousin beside me was okay, but most importantly I was going to be okay. It was a beautiful experience I think I won't ever forget. 

After yoga, we sat down and talked about my blog, the meaning of the butterfly and my experience in yoga. It was when I realized we all have something to let go. If you have read it this far...you're probably even thinking about something that you have to let go. And it is perfectly normal. Sometimes though we just need help - and that's okay. 

So I want to leave you and me with this (because I am not perfect and I have my struggles)...

Focus your energy on living positively and proactively, you need to learn how to let go. One of the most difficult things for most people to let go of is relationships. Learning to let go of someone you’ve built a deep connection with and whom you’ve shared your life with is understandably difficult. However, in many cases, it’s necessary to let go to unlock an extraordinary life. Just remember the good moments shared and what your relationship has taught you. 

Holding on to pain doesn’t fix anything. Replaying the past over and over again doesn’t change it, and wishing things were different doesn’t make it so. In some cases, especially when it comes to the past, all we can do is accept whatever it is we are holding on to and then let it go. That’s how everything changes. We have to let go of what is hurting us, even if it feels almost impossible.

Deciding to hold on to the past will hold us back from creating a strong sense of self - a self that isn’t defined by our past, but rather by who we want to be. 

Holding on is a critical way that we keep ourselves from reaching our goals. Whether we are holding a grudge, holding on to memories from a relationship or holding on to a negative experience that replays in our minds. There’s comfort in familiarity and justification, even when it’s rooted in a negative experience. But, ultimately, not knowing how to let go has no real benefit – it only holds us back from achieving our true potential.

“The trees are about to show us how lovely it is to let dead things go.” - Unknown 

I want you to know that it's okay to be sad - I get sad a lot these days. So I can't stress this enough that it is okay. Everyone goes through it and you're not alone. Just remember you are strong and you are beautiful. 

So when you go through the process of letting go, think of what inspires you.

I want you to challenge yourself to get a piece of paper or sticky note and write down something that has been stuck in your head or has bothered you (even if its something as simple as your sibling ruining your favorite shirt). I want you to write it down, to burn it. So grab a lighter, go outside and breathe. Think about what you can do to change old habits and think about why you aren't letting go. Think about the goods times in your life - your happiest moments. By burning this paper you are beginning the journey of letting go. Remember that growth is a process. It's not something that will come overnight. The process is a long and hard journey. But its the balance of holding on and letting go. Just remember life doesn't get easier...your wings just get stronger.